There are unwritten contracts between you and others.  

This unwritten contract is what you expect of one another.

• Do you speak out?

• Do you keep quiet? 

• Why aren't you doing this...?

• Why are you doing this...?

You may not have agreed to these terms outright, but rest assured, your friends know about them.  

What I'm speaking of is what I write about often, expectations.  

I'm also speaking about culture.

For me, culture is a curated and cultivated set of internal beliefs and actions - it's like the intersection of morality and ethics.   

I think for you, and for others, culture is deeply personal. We care if others do things, or don't, that assault our culture.  

• Seemingly insensitive comments;

• The absence of one's voice from a cause;

• The lack of presence during a tough time;

• Not having your back the way you hoped they would; or

• Not adding up to the human, you expect those you trust to act.

I encourage you to give people the grace of being responsible for their own lives.
That what people do on the chessboard that is their world is their decision, not yours.

And, I encourage you to give people the grace of doubt - they may make decisions that fly in the face of your values, that doesn't mean they're an awful human.  

If you want to serve others in a meaningful way, allow them to be themselves, be still, watch, and respond. I think you'll find a certain freedom you've been looking for in that mindset.  

A deep thanks to my friend, Ian, for a bit of insight that inspired this post.