My mom sometimes asks, “what do you want… for Christmas?”
My reply is, almost always, “a used book” or “we have too much stuff, please don’t get anything.”
My mom, almost always, never listens. (I love you, Mom.)
My mom asks a question we should ask at work more often. What do you want?

How many meetings have you been in where people meander around their ask in an attempt to soften their request? Why couldn’t we be more direct - like my mom?

Perhaps the reason is that being straight forward feels bold; and perhaps what feels bold leaves us vulnerable. Humans typically avoid the feeling of vulnerability. If that’s even a little bit true, then my mom is a symbol of strength and self-confidence.

What do you want is a question that puts the asker in a vulnerable place. It invites the answerer to enter that same place. When both people are on the same plane, great things can happen.