“The secret to happiness is to see all the marvels of the world, and never forget the drops of oil on the spoon.” - Paulo Coelho, The AlchemistIn that part of the story, a character recalls a story of a boy who visited a wise man to learn the secret to happiness. The wise man said he would tell the secret, but the boy first had to walk around the wise man’s castle holding a spoon filled with oil and not drop the oil. The boy did that, but failed to notice the beauty around him. When the wise man challenged him to go back and notice the beauty, the boy returned but spilled oil. Finding happiness and being effective is about a formula - Big > Small > Big. Big - Stop and notice what’s around you, the big picture, taking it all in.Small - Do focused work. Big - Stop and reflect. How far have you come? Where are you headed? What are the challenges?Small - Do focused work.… and so on, and so forth.Finding effectiveness and happiness is less about “doing these 5 things for a happier life” and more about stopping, focusing, working, reflecting, focusing, working, reflecting… without spilling a drop of oil.

In August I blogged about using a decision journal to navigate big moments. Now, I am telling you journalling your decisions will be the best thing you do. Period. Why?When you journal a potential decision you are moving out of the present and into the future - the Future You. As “Future You” you get to imagine what your world would be like, and determine if “Present You” screwed you over; Jerry Seinfeld best explains the concept here. You also get something else…After you have made your decision and you become “Future You”, you might feel anxiety. You may ask questions like, Did I do the right thing? What if I was wrong? This is too hard, did I set myself up to fail? What if I screwed up? When that moment strikes, thank “Past You”. “Past You” took the time to lay out the implications and ramifications of the decision. “Past You” considered what would happen if you fail. “Past You” gave you the plan. Review “Past You’s” work and thank them. They gave you something you desperately need - a reason to be confident in the face of doubt.A reason to be confident in the face of doubt is the single greatest benefit of journaling through your decisions. When the heat is on and the pressure high, the crippling doubt you experience quickly abates with a reason to be confident.

There are two oversimplified sides to alchemy - the transmutational side, and the story telling side. In the broadest sense, alchemists sought to turn metals into gold. To make something precious from nothing. We do that every day. Baking, music, cooking, making things are all forms taking raw materials and transmutating them into a new product. A basic sourdough bread is flour, water, salt. In another sense, we are alchemists in that we use allegory - stories - to impart wisdom. As a leader, coach, parent, teacher, or manager you use stories to help those you seek to serve solve a problem. In all respects, the work we do - making and sharing things - is work that helps others. Cheers to the alchemists in the world, cheers to you.

I took a look at our blog’s analytics to see posts have been most engaging - where you have spent the most time. 5. What is the Better Question?4. Another thought of “f”ailure3. Sourdough bread is a metaphor for life.2. Be Direct with Respect1. Rest and Waken Your Inner WarriorLast year you got 355 posts, the longest streak since I’ve started. Most of last year’s content centered around life, decisions, questions, and making sense of it all. It’s like you received a free 355 page book on life. What about this year? What’s changing? Nothing. I plan to continue writing daily. I will continue to write about life, doing life better, and lessons I pick up along the way. If you are a subscriber, I hope to give you no less than a 356 page book by the end of the year. Thank you for making the choice to opt-in and follow along. If there’s ever anything I can do to make this blog more useful, let me know.

What do you want this moment to be about? This day? This month? This year? If you are in the habit of setting a resolution, instead of thinking of hitting the gym and all the things you’re going to do… can you try to center on just one thing?The one thing that if you accomplish this year it will absolutely change and alter your life in an immeasurably beneficial way? Then, think, what’s the one thing I need to do this quarter so that I can accomplish the one thing this year?Then, what’s the one thing I can do this month so that I accomplish my quarter one thing?Keep going down until you get to - what’s the one thing I can do right now? The distance between where you want to be and where you are closes with just one small step.Happy New Year!

My grandmother made a mean ginger snap cookie. Just enough crunch on the outside with a soft and chewy center. There are two versions of the recipe she left us. Version 1 - uses 1 eggs and 1 cup of lard; and Version 2 uses 2 eggs and 1.5 cups of lard.If you use follow both recipes verbatim you don’t get as chewy a cookie. Why?Because Grandma Brady didn’t share the whole recipe with you. What Grandma Brady didn’t share is that you use 1 whole egg and 1 egg yolk. The same hack used to make super chewy chocolate chip cookies, too. Recipes are culture.There are things that people in the know, know. If you’re not in the know, you don’t get the benefit of being the insider. Excluding others can be a benefit. Grandma Brady held this recipe hostage so her grandkids would beg, scream, kick, and negotiate with their parents to see her. Even after she left us, she still held something back. Some things are meant to be for you. Keep them safe.

They are going to piss you off, get in your way, obstruct you at every turn, show only their selfishness, ridicule you, judge you, take from you, and make your life utterly miserable. Tell yourself that every morning.Then, when you encounter someone who is not that, watch how much you’ll appreciate that person.Sometimes negative thinking helps us appreciate the positives.

When I worked on cruise ships, I would get maps to help me navigate ports of call. Invariably, the maps weren’t any help. Buildings, streets, landscapes all changed. Many times it landmarks the map would use to orientate the traveler were not in view because of dense old cities. Instead of using the map, I had to pay attention to the actual territory.I developed a sixth sense for knowing where the water was at all times. If I could find the water, I could find the ship. A map is like a plan. It shows landmarks (milestones) and possible routes for effective tours. However, the map is not the territory, it’s only the gist. If 2022 taught me anything at all, it taught me that the map is not the territory. What you believe in your head to be true, may not be true. Instead, use a map/plan to give you a big picture, and then leverage your ability to study what’s right in front of you to navigate towards your destination. Develop a sixth sense for what’s most important, and anchor yourself to that. The map is not the territory.

I found this gem from a few years ago - the Ulysses pact.Truly - I am still working on keeping the promises I make to myself. What I’ve learned in the last few years is that the more specific and time bound the promise, the more likely I’ll stay with it for a bit. However, the more simple and broad the promise, the more likely I’ll keep it for longer.Example…Short commitment: Stop eating after 2pm. Long commitment: Keep yourself open to new experiences that promote your wellbeing so that you can help others. The former was good for a while, but it’s the latter that has allowed me to flex my interests and keep me from being too rigid. That’s what works for me. What works for you?

“It’s the simple things in life that are the most extraordinary; only wise men are able to understand them.” - The old woman from The Alchemist, by Paulo CoelhoThe simplest ideas - the ones that even a toddler can understand - are the ideas that spread. It’s no wonder that military organizations, the CIA, songwriters, musicians, bloggers (i guess), execs, and so many others struggle to find ways to make their ideas simpler. It’s like weight.It’s easy to put on weight, but it’s mission to get rid of it. The simplest way to get rid of weight is to take in less calories than you spend. That simple. Most people know that. So why is it so hard? Perhaps we want to believe life is more complicated than that. Nothing can be that easy, right? I’m convinced that the geniuses in our midst don’t ask that question. Instead, they ask, Why is nobody seeing this yet?Perhaps the old woman was on to something.