Attitudes towards my nightmares

Waking up from a nightmare about tornadoes sweeping me off the ground, people shooting me, realizing that I am late for a gig, or — worse — realizing that I'm not dressed upon showing up for a gig are traumatic for me. Until recently.

Upon waking up from one of these dreams I challenged myself: what's my attitude towards a nightmare?

My attitude towards nightmares up until that point was to be frightened. I could feel that fright in my body — heart beating harder, pain around my neck, unease about falling back asleep. Except this time I decided I would adopt a posture of whimsical curiosity.

That particular night I woke up because someone was chasing me. I told myself that I'm going to fall back asleep, and when I see that person again I'm going to run to them, embrace them, invite them to shoot me if they'd like, and ask why. I did that.

Back asleep, and in the dream, I saw that person again. I remember going up to them, embracing them, and asking why. I learned from this dream character that they're not trying to shoot me, shooting me is just what they're supposed to do. And so I invited them to do something else... then the scene changed. I woke up calmly that morning.

Since then, I try to be open and whimsically curious about my nightmares. I write down what I hope to accomplish if I experience nightmares and I find myself accomplishing them in the dream sometimes. I also experience less nightmares.

I tried applying the same idea — towards traffic or life's frustrations. Changing my attitude towards the frustration, and finding that what frustrates me isn't often the bad traffic, it's my relationship to the traffic... traffic is just traffic, why should it be anything else?